Saturday, October 29, 2011

Loving The Money-Changers

Jesus was one of the 1%. Who knew?

With a hat-tip to the inimitable Hugh Kramer, I come with news that Bryan Fischer has declared that Jesus would attack Occupy Wall Street protesters. What the FUCK.

That's not big enough. WHAT THE FUCK.

Jesus would side with the rich and privileged and powerful over "the least of these", would he, you crazy old bastard? Son of a bitch. I don't say this very often, the most recent example was Jerry Falwell - but I hate this piece of shit and I can't wait until he fucking dies. He can sit there and write this epic Christian Taliban buttclump:

A CNN anchor asked earlier this week whether or not Jesus would occupy Wall Street.
That question can be answered with a categorical “No.”
First, Jesus has no truck with rank, blatant hypocrites*. The OWS crowd has now fallen to squabbling over who gets a slice of the $500,000 which has been donated to them, and which, by the way, they put in one of the evil, greedy banks they are out to destroy.

I love that. That's some quality fucking logic reversal there. It's not that OWS is made up of people sick of Wall Street being staffed by people so obscenely wealthy and greedy we can't call them robber barons because barons aren't rich enough. It's that the peasants are greedy! How dare they want to be able to eat and pay their bills in the same month!

Secondly, Jesus has no truck with those whose entire agenda is to flagrantly disobey two of the Ten Commandments of God.

God said, “Thou shalt not steal,” a commandment Jesus affirmed on numerous occasions. Stealing is wrong, and it doesn’t make it right when government does it under color of law.

Hoh-lee shit. Really, Fischer? Really? You couldn't say that to Bush, who (A) actually fucking stole under the guise of government, and (B) might've been fucking stupid enough to listen to you, and maybe stopped this shit from happening in the first place?

And the OWS crowd is animated by a thoroughly ugly disregard for the 10th Commandment as well. God says, “Thou shalt not covet...any thing that is thy neighbor’s.” And yet the Occupiers are driven by a dark, bitter, resentful, angry and acquisitive greed for stuff that belongs to other people.

I submit that no political program that is predicated on a violation of twenty percent of God’s moral law can possibly be right, can possibly work, or can possibly be good for America.

I submit that any per cent of your god's law, enshrined into the law of the land solely because you think your god said it, can never, ever be good for any nation. Especially the tenth commandment, which legislates against nasty thoughts and is thus both totally unenforceable and completely against nature. You prick.

And again, Fischer rails against hypocrisy and then turns around in the same fucking article and bludgeons his own point to death. OWS are greedy? Really? That's why they're protesting Wall Street's massive greed and acquisitiveness that drives the 1% to gather literally pointless amounts of money until their bank accounts are so huge they would take longer than a human lifetime to spend? It's that the 99% are greedy for wanting a big enough account that they can afford to take their children to hospital since you and yours declared free healthcare was an abomination in the eyes of your god?

Fuck you, Bryan Fischer. You're a gigantic piece of shit, and I'll be glad when you're fucking dead.

*Well, shit, now I need a new irony meter again. Until Karl Rove finally succumbs to whatever disease makes his head that shape, we won't have the raw materials to make one strong enough to withstand Fischer.