Thursday, December 29, 2011

How We Do It, or Sometimes Shit Is Awful

It's funny. Sometimes you're in a discussion with someone and you wish for an example of something. You want a simple, effective way to help them understand what you're talking about - something you can relate to them with, so you can take it a step further and show them a perspective they otherwise probably wouldn't have noticed.

Sometimes you get an example and really don't fucking want it. Yesterday I was asked how I can deal with death and see life as anything other than pointless. Well, fucker, this is what you get.

This is my cat, Patsy (named for Joanna Lumley's character in Absolutely Fabulous). She's sixteen, and as I write this, she's dying. Her hind legs don't really work; she stopped eating yesterday, she can't drink water properly and she's losing her voice - which might be the most painful part of it for the rest of us. She was given to mimicking the tones of voice we use in greeting each other when one of us entered a room; it looked a lot like she was trying to communicate the way we did. Maybe she was. She's a fucking smart cat. Now she can't do that; she can barely make sounds.

We got Patsy from a shelter when I was thirteen, and she was three. She'd apparently had a bad life before that; beautiful as she was, someone had treated her so badly she almost panicked herself unconscious her first night in the house. Judicious application of cat treats was necessary to get her to come out from under the stereo (oddly, as soon as she came out, she picked up a pen in her mouth and carried it around with her for about half an hour, then never did anything of the kind again).

Now I'm twenty-six. She's sixteen, and fully half my life later she's finally over her fear of the vacuum cleaner...and I'm watching her body shut down over the course of a few days. There are people who'd call this pointless attachment to an animal. I would, quite honestly, be very fucking tempted to hit them in the face. Anyone who's owned and cared for an animal for any length of time can tell you that they very quickly become family, and seem to take on human traits. It's been posited that hanging around humans can affect some animals and raise their intelligence. Regardless of whether it's true, Patsy's the most stark example I've ever seen of why people might think so; she tries to talk to us, copies our intonation. I'm half-sure I heard her try a consonant once or twice. Her intelligence seemed almost comparable to ours, like a toddler who can't quite communicate; she very quickly became a well-loved part of the family. Watching her die is excruciating.

What I'm getting at here is that this is more or less how a materialist and anti-theist* like me reacts to every death of a loved one. The fact that she's a cat doesn't actually change much; the period of grieving is shorter as reality reasserts itself, but the thought of losing her, before the fact, is just as intensely emotive as losing anyone in my family.

What this has in common with a believer's view of losing a beloved pet is that neither I nor they believe that my cat is going to experience an afterlife. She will simply stop. Her clockwork's winding down, and she is going to die and that's it. Soon. Maybe tonight. Her body will become electrically inert, and begin to break down into its component molecules through decomposition. This is, give or take some greater or smaller knowledge of the biological processes involved, how - say - a Muslim or Jew or Christian in my position would also view the coming events. A Hindu or Buddhist, or someone of another faith that involves reincarnation, would have a slightly different view of things; for the three big monotheist groups, though, this works well enough as a comparison.

Where it differs, of course, is that this is exactly the same way I view a human's death. Same processes, with a lot more grieving for various reasons ranging from language and interaction (letting us get a lot more involved with humans than other species) to plain old human conceit making our brains tend to register other humans as more important. I've been told I'm a depressing person because of this; I've been told I shouldn't think such terrible, bleak things. I have had this said to me more than once, by people who really, honestly believed that if I didn't agree with them before my own death I would suffer until the end of time.

Next time someone tells you they'd be depressed without the idea of an afterlife, remember what faith they are; most versions of heaven involve a ringside gloater's seat for watching what happens in hell.

And next time someone mentions to you they think animals go to heaven, thank them from me for at least trying to help.

*Anti-theist, in the late Hitchens' definition: not only do I not believe that religious stories are true, but I think it would be bloody awful if they were.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Scouts Do Lead People Forward, After All

This is actually the most awesome thing I've heard about a kids' social activity in a long time: the Girl Scouts are allowing transgendered boys to join as girls. The second most awesome thing is that the usual bigots are losing their shit in exactly the ways you'd predict from something like this - I found out about this from the American Family Association, whose 'call to action' (read: 'oh no people are moving further from the 1950s and megachurches') email list I've hooked into for laughs.

The seven-year-old's name is Bobby Montoya, and she (biologically the kid's a boy, but identifies as a girl and frankly at that age there's no real difference) was initially rejected by the Girl Scouts of Colorado because of plumbing that won't be anyone's business for at least another eight or nine years:

“I said, ‘Well, what’s the big deal,'” Bobby’s mother, Felisha Archuleta, told KUSA. “She said, ‘It doesn’t matter how he looks. He has boy parts, and he can’t be in Girl Scouts. Girl Scouts don’t allow that [and] I don’t want to be in trouble by parents or my supervisor.'"

Hey, bureaucracy used as a thin veil over something that looks a fuck of a lot like pointless biological determinism. Who'd have thought? Only problem for this buttcloud is that the Girl Scouts as an organisation actually doesn't see it that way, and takes a much more accepting approach to the whole thing: the Girl Scouts of Colorado have released a statement saying that that's bull and the kid is welcome to join.

“We accept all girls in kindergarten through 12th grade as members. If a child identifies as a girl and the child's family presents her as a girl, Girl Scouts of Colorado welcomes her as a Girl Scout,” according to the statement.

“Our requests for support of transgender kids have grown, and Girl Scouts of Colorado is working to best support these children, their families and the volunteers who serve them," the statement continued. "In this case, an associate delivering our program was not aware of our approach. She contacted her supervisor, who immediately began working with the family to get the child involved and supported in Girl Scouts. We are accelerating our support systems and training so that we're better able to serve all girls, families and volunteers."

That troop leader had better be fucking grateful. The organisation's just covered their arse out of the goodness of their hearts, even if it was an honest mistake - for one thing, a troop leader in an organisation that looks after young children had BETTER know all the fuckin' rules. On the other hand, if it wasn't an accident, and the troop leader was actually discriminating against the kid based on their own ideas of biological determinism rather than following the Scouts' rules, then the Scouts had better give the motherfucker a long talking-to.

And as usual, there's some motherfucker who's declaring this to be dangerous. How dare children play together!

But others think the Girl Scouts should be more steadfast in its policies, letting boys be boys and girls be girls.

To cross that line “is child sexual abuse, the violation of children’s genetic reality aided by a society that is reverting back to the dark," said Judith A. Reisman, visiting professor of law at Liberty University School of Law. "If he has male parts, he is a male. The children in a given society always reflect its belief systems. Until the 1950s the Western world was built and run by adults largely clear about their sexuality and their beliefs. People used to ask which is stronger, nature or nurture. Now we are so 'smart' we don’t even know we have a nature.”

I love the fucking false equivalency there. Letting kids be kids means ignoring that they're doomed to have sinful sexual thoughts about other people when they grow up!

Fox News' Keith Ablow, a fucking retard in his own right and a self-proclaimed 'doctor' with no actual medical qualifications (with a history of this shit - when that transgendered dancer Chaz Bono was on Dancing With The Stars, Ablow compared being transgendered to anorexia and cutting off one's own legs) has weighed in on this too. Starting with "I know a lot of experts will disagree with me" - because they're experts after all, they know what they're talking about - called this "a form of abuse" and said it should be stopped until more data was available on what potential harm it could do (because, y'know, there are ways to gather data on things without observation of their effects. Rush Limbaugh's never looked at something before complaining about it in his life).

“On the face of it, it seems to be expecting far too much psychologically of young girls to ignore the anatomy of a boy and act as though he is a girl," Ablow said. "The girls are just developing comfort with their own bodies, after all.”

How fucking loony is this man? He thinks these seven-year-olds won't be able to play together because THE GIRLS WON'T BE ABLE TO STOP THINKING ABOUT THE BOY'S PENIS. Because even that early in life, as far as Ablow's concerned, that's all women should focus on.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Loving The Money-Changers

Jesus was one of the 1%. Who knew?

With a hat-tip to the inimitable Hugh Kramer, I come with news that Bryan Fischer has declared that Jesus would attack Occupy Wall Street protesters. What the FUCK.

That's not big enough. WHAT THE FUCK.

Jesus would side with the rich and privileged and powerful over "the least of these", would he, you crazy old bastard? Son of a bitch. I don't say this very often, the most recent example was Jerry Falwell - but I hate this piece of shit and I can't wait until he fucking dies. He can sit there and write this epic Christian Taliban buttclump:

A CNN anchor asked earlier this week whether or not Jesus would occupy Wall Street.
That question can be answered with a categorical “No.”
First, Jesus has no truck with rank, blatant hypocrites*. The OWS crowd has now fallen to squabbling over who gets a slice of the $500,000 which has been donated to them, and which, by the way, they put in one of the evil, greedy banks they are out to destroy.

I love that. That's some quality fucking logic reversal there. It's not that OWS is made up of people sick of Wall Street being staffed by people so obscenely wealthy and greedy we can't call them robber barons because barons aren't rich enough. It's that the peasants are greedy! How dare they want to be able to eat and pay their bills in the same month!

Secondly, Jesus has no truck with those whose entire agenda is to flagrantly disobey two of the Ten Commandments of God.

God said, “Thou shalt not steal,” a commandment Jesus affirmed on numerous occasions. Stealing is wrong, and it doesn’t make it right when government does it under color of law.

Hoh-lee shit. Really, Fischer? Really? You couldn't say that to Bush, who (A) actually fucking stole under the guise of government, and (B) might've been fucking stupid enough to listen to you, and maybe stopped this shit from happening in the first place?

And the OWS crowd is animated by a thoroughly ugly disregard for the 10th Commandment as well. God says, “Thou shalt not covet...any thing that is thy neighbor’s.” And yet the Occupiers are driven by a dark, bitter, resentful, angry and acquisitive greed for stuff that belongs to other people.

I submit that no political program that is predicated on a violation of twenty percent of God’s moral law can possibly be right, can possibly work, or can possibly be good for America.

I submit that any per cent of your god's law, enshrined into the law of the land solely because you think your god said it, can never, ever be good for any nation. Especially the tenth commandment, which legislates against nasty thoughts and is thus both totally unenforceable and completely against nature. You prick.

And again, Fischer rails against hypocrisy and then turns around in the same fucking article and bludgeons his own point to death. OWS are greedy? Really? That's why they're protesting Wall Street's massive greed and acquisitiveness that drives the 1% to gather literally pointless amounts of money until their bank accounts are so huge they would take longer than a human lifetime to spend? It's that the 99% are greedy for wanting a big enough account that they can afford to take their children to hospital since you and yours declared free healthcare was an abomination in the eyes of your god?

Fuck you, Bryan Fischer. You're a gigantic piece of shit, and I'll be glad when you're fucking dead.

*Well, shit, now I need a new irony meter again. Until Karl Rove finally succumbs to whatever disease makes his head that shape, we won't have the raw materials to make one strong enough to withstand Fischer.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

So Fucking Sick Of This Shit

It's time for an alternate viewpoint on this. 9/11 happened ten years ago. And what too few people seem to realise is that the terrorists have won.

Michael Moore was fucking right. Okay, yeah, he sounded preachy as hell about it, and everyone got a big laugh out of it ha ha look at the sanctimonious liberal okay time for some fat jokes FUCK YOU. He was right and he was lambasted for being right, in a time when the people who needed an excuse - and found that 9/11 fit the bill nicely - really wanted as few people as possible to catch on to what the fuck they were doing. Moore had it spot-on when Iraq was first invaded, sparking the second of two wars that have each dwarfed 9/11 on their own in terms of civilian casualties, in Dude, Where's My Country: 'Hey, let's dismantle our way of life so the terrorists can't blow it up!'

What was the biggest meme the bastards spread about Al Qaeda? 'They hate us for our freedoms!' What fucking freedoms? There aren't any left. America has become a place where mosques are vandalised just for not being Christian places of worship and innocent people are attacked - potentially fatally - for being Muslim, thanks to the shaved-monkey touchiness with which the US Christian establishment has succeeded in saturating the nation's congregation.

Islam has become the new Communism, the latest bogeyman, and no one with a vested interest has lost any time in turning anyone swarthy-looking into a target of suspicion and paranoia. The very word 'Islamofascist' was coined as a club for bludgeoning the American populace about the head until the nation's behaviour, seen from the rest of the world's viewpoint, closer resembles that of a chicken than a human being - convinced the world is coming to an end one minute, busily consuming as much as it can the next, and eagerly closing the barn door to shut itself in rather than deal with the rest of the world in a rational manner - sacrificing what used to be seen as essential human liberty for the mere illusion of greater safety.

And it's going to keep getting worse. Brian Kane has put a great phrase to it:

It’s time to give it over to history once and for all. There’s no question that the aftermath has long since overshadowed the tragedy itself. It is the aftermath that has reshaped the world in its twisted and destructive grasp. We’ve long ago stopped even pretending to be interested in the lives lost and lives disrupted. The power elite found every possible avenue of exploitation — political, economic, social — and have ruined anything and everything in their efforts to wring every last ounce of worth from them. And with the reality wiped away by the iconography and ideology, we can safely let it go. The whirlwind it created is now permanently self-sustaining without it.

It should be let go. It won't.

It will be kept going, the fear will be kept in the background of every news report possible (as well as almost every Fox News broadcast, pretending as they do to be an actual news service), the wars will be carried on until there's nothing further to be squeezed from the nation, and then the serfs will be given something else to be worried about. More than anything else for the past thirty years, 9/11 has been a supremely fortunate windfall for those who envision America as an aristocracy, who look at the country's middle class the way locusts look at fields of wheat, who can and will do anything possible to get away with taxing the living fuck out of anyone but the rich. Bush and the GOP senate were able to strong-arm a lot of their deregulation fantasies through, with almost no resistance, and loot the treasury in an orgy of war profiteering. Without 9/11 it would have taken another decade to achieve all this.

Meanwhile, the fundamentalists of both Islam and Christianity get what they want - a polarised, us-versus-them worldview spoonfed to every believer they can reach, each faith's leaders painting the other as controlled by , if not embodying, supernatural forces of evil. And everyone else, from the sane believers to the tired, angry idealist nonbelievers, gets a little bit more fucking sick of this shit.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

I'm not a homosexual? (NSFW)

Reading about some insane shit that Michele Bachmann has said just reminded me about what a neuropsychologist said about me.

In a very long and detailed report, he basically summed me up as "Shy, manic depressed, suffers from ADHD, and while she says she's attracted to women, she isn't."

Sure, I'm not attracted to women in a normal way. I love women's bodies, I want to caress their breasts, to hold them tight against me, to kiss them tenderly, and to fuck them hard with my dick.

... wait a minute...

Yeah, I secretly want to bone women. That's how I am attracted to them. As for men, I want to bone them too, but I love the fact that my boyfriend can take me in a heterosexual manner. It's a weird feeling. I love being a woman, so I'm not transexual. I might be a transvestite though. Which is alright by Mick because I get to keep my vagina. And that's alright by me too. Even though my dream self keeps giving me dicks, I actually like being a woman.

And I like being in a heterosexual relationship with my man.

But sometimes I am reminded that I'm bisexual.

Now, I know that this blog isn't all about me. So I'm going to stop talking about me and talk about other people.

Like this neuro doctor, who spent 10 minutes talking with me, then shoved me in a small room to do a series of tests, and then decided he knew all about me (they were pretty good tests though.), there are multiple others who believe that being gay isn't the fault of the person.

But it is a fault and has a cure.

What is the cure you might ask? Why it's simple. Just pray the gay away.

You simply join a ministry, abstain from sex, and if you're a tranny you throw away the clothes that you feel good about wearing but isn't considered normal for the gender you were born in. Then you go to church, confess every sin, pray every day, read the bible, get a good job, date a few members of the opposite sex, and then just hate yourself because you're still sexually attracted to members of the same sex.

This has actually led to suicides.

Now, I'm not saying that being a Christian means that you have to be straight as an arrow. After all, I'm bisexual. In fact, I have met ministers and members of churches who believed that the bible doesn't come out and state that being gay is sinful. My boyfriend may speak differently, but if you take all of the bible and follow every single law to the letter, then my mother would still be married and not allowed to speak in church except through her husband, and I would be stoned to death at the door of my parents.

The bible is open to interpretation. And my interpretation is that all genders are equal, and all peoples of different faiths, cultures, and sexual orientation should be free to speak, free to live, free to worship (or not worship), free to learn, and, most importantly, free to love.

America wasn't founded on Christian beliefs, nor is it run on them like other countries are. America wasn't founded on hate or prejudice against others (even if some of the founding fathers were bigots, sexist, and racist... okay, all of them). And America wasn't born to hate.

But why are so many people saying that God should always stay in the pledge, as it always has; that all men, be they atheist, Muslim, Christian, or Buddhist should swear on the bible; that homosexuals should be killed or at the least they shouldn't be encouraged by marriage?

Well, let me tell you something.

The pledge of allegiance never contained the word "Under God" until the mid 1900s.

People swear on the bible because it is sacred to the individual, but for someone who doesn't believe in it, swearing on it is about as effective as swearing on a piece of toilet paper.

And one last thing.

Heterosexuals are the ones who have gay babies. ;p

Thursday, August 18, 2011

I'm such a slut.

This utter bullshit.

I was randomly looking on one of my favorite websites (memebase), when I came across a picture of a boy carrying a sign that said "My mom is a slut", with the mom behind him. A link took me to a website that explained what it meant.

Slutwalk started in Toronto after a few women heard the Toronto police's stance on rape and sexual assault. The Toronto police pretty much said that any woman who is raped or assaulted or abused is a slut. It's her fault, she's wearing the wrong clothes, she's being too free, she's the one opening herself to rape so it's her fault.

You've probably heard this before as well. Society blames the victim. It always has. And sexual abuse and rape can go both ways. When it's done to a woman, if she isn't yelling bloody murder and trying to kill her rapist, then she's done it willingly. Even religions may give laws that insinuate the blame is also on the victim. But I won't get into that

Slutwalk took me to their facebook page where multiple people put up news pages, outraged at the contents. Above is one such news page.

If you didn't read it, it's about a special ed student, a female seventh grade studen, who reported that she was raped by a classmate. Not only did the school not file a report, but they punished her for making false accusations and forced her to write an appology letter. All this without telling police or parents. They sent her back to class, the same class that the rapist was in.

It was after this that he pulled her out to the library and raped her again. She was afraid of telling the school because they wouldn't believe her.

A rape kit was administered and the boy's semen tested positive. There was proof of rape. He even admitted that he was guilty of raping her.

And still the school does not even give an appology. They're being sued.

I've read stories from the Slut walk. So many women are told they are sluts, in a bad, a horrible way, because they like sex or they wear slutty clothing, or even because their bodies grew big boobs. It's a horrible word that makes the victim feel small. And when a girl is called a slut, boys and men might think that because she's easy, she'll have sex with them. She'll be forced to giving the men pleasure, and afterwards they hate her. Family members and friends are not always considerate, especially since most cases of sexual assault, abuse, and rape happen to a girl by someone they know.

"No, your uncle couldn't have done that! I know him, he's my brother!"

It's so different when you look on the outside. But you can never truly know someone. They don't show you the same face they'll show their coworkers or their spouse.

Some women can't even file a police report because even though their husbands have been yelling at them and making them feel like shit, cornering them and telling them that they will rape them, the husbands never touched them. It was the woman who hit them first.

Some people can't file rape because they say yes for their own safety.

Some people can't file rape because they were so stoned they couldn't even talk.

I'll make it simple. If you let the person that you never wanted sex, and they put you in a situation where you were forced to say yes, then that is rape. Even if you didn't yell or fight back, it's rape.

Be strong. Don't let people judge you for what clothes you wear or how sexual you want to be. It is never your fault. Men won't pick and choose based on clothing or how a woman carries herself. He would have taken you even if you were just wearing sweat pants instead of that miniskirt.

Be proud of who you are. If you love sex, don't let others words hurt you. Sex is a natural part of life and is a beautiful and wonderful thing. Just because some people take it and abuse it and turn it into some horrible nightmare, that doesn't mean that you did anything wrong.

Wear revealing clothing. Blush and laugh about the sexual adventures you enjoyed. Live freely, love freely.

Women have the right to be as sexual as they want. They have the right to say no and to be free of sexual abuse. And for those uncounted men who also are raped and abused, and for those who are finding their place in their sexual and gender identities, be brave and fight for who you are and who you love.

Everyone should have the right to a life without rape.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Fuck Zimbabwe

Okay. I've been on my own again for nearly two weeks, and I'm good and pissed now. So here we go.

I know it's entirely possible someone from Zimbabwe will read this. I'm actually fine with that possibility, because it means they'll have this pointed out to them in a way that Mugabe shithead won't be able to cushion.

The company that runs the mine is headed by a personal friend of President Mugabe. A second camp is located in nearby Muchena
"It is the place of torture where sometimes miners are unable to walk on account of the beatings," a victim who was released from the main camp in February told the BBC.
All the released prisoners the BBC spoke to requested anonymity.
"They beat us 40 whips in the morning, 40 in the afternoon and 40 in the evening," said the man, who still could not use one of his arms after the beatings and could barely walk.
"They used logs to beat me here, under my feet, as I lay on the ground. They also used stones to beat my ankles."
He and other former captives said men are held in the camp for several days at a time, before new prisoners come in.
Women are released more quickly, often after being raped, witnesses said.

Is there anyone, anywhere in the world, with a healthy psyche, to whom this wouldn't appear obscene?

There's only so much a population can take. And if - when - Zimbabwe finally gets tired of this ancient, spiteful, malicious, corrupt, lying, delusional, power-mad, self-aggrandised, bigoted, horribly abusive old despot...then it'll be bloody. He'll fight them with everything he's got. But he can't kill all of them. And they'll tear him apart. Or if he dies first, then whichever crony replaces him. The populace will murder him, and a lot of people will die. All we'll be able to do from outside is pick up the pieces...however few there are.

Looking at this shitpile, I'm very tempted to hope they get it over with soon. At least he won't poison them any more.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

No Angry Posts

Really, we have no reason to be angry.


Because Mick and myself are being happy being together for the second time evar!

Hehehehehehe. Here we are, together in the really really cold place called England, and we are obviously really happy.

I think I'll go back and be more happy.

Bye for now!

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

My Oppression's Worse Than Yours

Wow, hey, look, I'm documenting religious hypocrisy from someone other than a Catholic.* Problem is, it's a Muslim. Again. Saying awful shit about gay people. Again.

This time it's Bilal Philips, the brain-donor who got kicked out of Germany for being a bigoted fuckhead and endorsing the extermination of gay people. I can see why the Germans might be a bit upset about that, they've seen that shit before. Our walking buttcloud Bilal has been speaking at a conference in Canada, complaining about Islamophobia. In the same city, on the same day, as a gay pride parade that - under his vaunted 'holy laws' - would have been fired on by police. Nice.

“I got expelled from Germany for life, why? Because I said I believe that according to Islamic law, homosexuals should be executed if they are caught in the act. It’s Islamic law. I’m not allowed to believe that? … Just to believe that, you’re a threat to the society?

“So this is how vigilant they are,” he said. “We should be also vigilant with the media. When things are said, we should be responsive, we should be on Google, on Facebook, whatever. We should be responding to these things.”

People are responsive, you prick, but it doesn't get a lot of publicity because they get the ontological shit kicked out of them in every argument they start over the subject. And the reason people are vigilant is because there's some arsehole giving speeches in their country to exhort faithful Muslims to kill gay people. By implying, through bludgeoning with the scripture, that they're not devout Muslims if they let the gays live.

Mr. Murray, who was Winnipeg’s first openly gay mayor, noted he has no problem with the conference itself, and has no plans to try have such speakers barred from attending. But he said he had asked police to monitor the conference, plans to meet with the event’s organizers and may ask if he can speak at it next year.

“We live in a pluralistic society,” he said. “It’s always disturbing when anybody brings in a speaker who tries to suggest that someone’s life is worth so little, that someone can be killed simply for being who they are. That is the polar opposite of what Pride represents and about what we represent.”

Bloody good idea, and nicely handled too. Good to see someone's capable of handling stuff like a reasonable human being.

*That should shut up that one arsehole who emailed me complaining that I was as bad as Longinus for "only ever saying bad things about the Vatican". Cunt.

Friday, July 1, 2011

What the...?!

I'll take this from a video I saw in class. Many cultures that differ in religion and history usually ends up coming up with the same rules and laws as to what is human rights. A man by the name of John Peters Humphrey later composed this into an actual list, where the U.N. adopted it in 1948.

For governments, this means that they have to set up a list of laws to protect human rights, at least for the wealthy and fortunate. For religions, this too means a list of what is right and wrong. But these are both influenced by the cultures, and what the general populous believes is moral or immoral, based on what they perceive as their own god given rights.

Now, talking about this video. Jesus is seen as a moral teacher and a great man, sure. But I think that there is a reason there are so many denominations in the church. Baptists know that wine is wine, but Catholics truly believe they are drinking God's blood when they take Communion. At the same time, Mormons are seen on the weird end of things due to the fact that they have quite a few polygamists in their community, and while some people wonder about if they even have a bible, Mormons are still considered Christian.

Now, the three (im)moral contributions.

1. Do not resist evil

I can't speak for my church or for my god, but I think what this means is that one should not try and face frivolous evil with a bad remark or a returned slap. For one, what would that prove? If a man is teaching about the love and forgiveness of being a Christian, and someone says "Well, your god is stupid!" is the right thing to get in a fist fight with this person? Of course not.

And this situation was exactly what Jesus meant. He did not mean "Oh, well if people are dying, I guess we shouldn't help them" because that is the opposite of what he taught.

2. Forgiving all sin

When you ask for forgiveness, it's not quite as horrible as he's putting it. To ask for forgiveness of all sins, you must repent. That doesn't just mean saying "Hey god, 'bout that guy I punched, I'm good about it, right?" Because he doesn't forgive something when he knows you're lying. Repenting means to 1. feel morally sorry/guilty about what you have done, 2. asking forgiveness, 3. trying to undo the wrong, 4. never doing it again. So, if you realize what you did, why it was wrong to do it, asking forgiveness from God and from the one you wronged, being forgiven from both, trying to undo the wrong you committed, and then never making the same mistake again, then you are truly forgiven of the sin.

In the event that the person in wrong did not ever feel guilty or sorry, theeeen.... well, what waits them is punishment enough.

3. Loving your neighbor as yourself.

Seriously, he twisted that one too?

It is teaching to consider every life as important as your own or as important as your loved one's. These are our neighbors, the men and women we are in a community with. It doesn't mean to trust them blindly, it means that if they need help, one should help them as though it were us in need. It means to treat them kindly and with respect. Not to spend the night with them or want to be with them, as you would with family or a lover.

Now for the rest of it.

What he taught the Jews was what they needed (Sure, he could have taught everyone, but the Jews were his chose people so blah blah blah). I dunno about you, but I don't like to be led around by the nose, blatantly, and suddenly told that what I was teaching was all wrong.

What did Jesus do?

He was mortal when he died. A man. When he was brought back, after who knows how long in hell, but was 3 days on earth, he was God incarnate.

During his time on earth, he performed miracles. He could have scared the shit out of everyone with terrible visions of Angles, but he didn't. He could have elated himself as king of the world and cure all illness and death and suffering. But he didn't.

This sounds a bit... dogmatic? But I think that when Adam and Eve ate from the apple, God gave the world to us in it's entirety. Meaning it's our choices that dictate how the world ends up. Just because some dude in sandals and in need of a shave says that he's here to steer us in the moral direction, that doesn't mean we suddenly lose our freedom to act as we want. It just means that if we do something bad, we will have to face the consequences (Repenting is one way, but some say that a step in repenting is punishment). It also means that we are given the choice to help our fellow man. If we give what we have to someone less fortunate, doesn't that make us a better moral person? It doesn't mean giving away everything, it means giving what you can.

So many learn this, and learn the story of the woman giving a paltry donation to the church, but they do not realize that it's not just the church who needs funds, it is the world. Instead of putting their bottles of shampoo in garage sales, they can donate them to the homeless and the needy. Instead of wasting gallons of water on a shower or bath, we can try conserving water and electricity to reduce waste and pollution.

Jesus cured the sick and dying, he brought a man from beyond the grave, he made the blind see. Of course, he could have suddenly gave us a bottle and shown us how to create antibiotics, or given us the cure for cancer or the common cold, but in my mind, it's better that he didn't. Such acts I think should be reserved for humanity. Wasn't it considered a triumph that a human was able to bottle up something that could suddenly turn a deadly sickness into a cure? Would that have still been such a momentous achievement if God simply handed it over? Would we have even deserved it? It was by the goodness of that one scientist that he didn't bottle it to sell at an extravagant price to the wealthy. He gave it to those in need. Wasn't this an act of kindness and just as great?

I guess I don't understand this video.



I can see how this man put a lot of thought into this video. He did some research.

But it wasn't enough to uproot my own faith. It was only enough for him to feel more justified in his own beliefs.

So what did this man accomplish?

A video tearing apart (and not very well) a 2000 year old religion. But he could have been doing more for humanity with his time. (I mean, it's not like those starving children can eat his words)

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Bachmann Hypocrite Overdrive

Well, it's started. I've stayed mostly small-scale in my mockery of the circus that is the 2012 Republican presidential lineup, but this is mostly because it's shitty - when a circus only has clowns, it's nothing but slightly sad comedy and you're better off going home and watching the Marx Brothers. But in what certain cunts call "liberal media demonising candidates", and what everyone else calls "of course the press are digging into their pasts, you stupid fuckers, they're running for Leader of the Free World, it's not liberals' fault the Republicans are almost always the ones with dirty secrets"...I have read of what might be the most egregious bit of right-wing hypocrisy since Newt Gingrich started spouting the phrase 'sanctity of marriage' and carefully avoided mentioning which of his two mistresses was the most sacred.

Michele Bachmann's husband Marcus is taking Medicaid money to 'Christian counsel' people. I'll just parse that out nice and clear: The husband of the woman who claims Medicaid is communism has been taking Medicaid's money to pretend quoting the Bible at people, instead of helping them come to terms with their problems and find solutions, makes him a decent therapist:

His views on counseling are unorthodox. In one radio interview, posted to YouTube, he criticizes counselors who focused on patients’ feelings, saying that instead patients should be instructed on the correct path. “Our culture is filled with, ‘How do you feel?’” he said. “When you get a counselor saying, ‘How do you feel?’ that’s really a mistake. What should drive us is the undeniable truth and the godly principles of truth in God’s word... Too often do we find counselors who will excuse a person and allow their feelings to take charge.” In another interview, he said, “We’ve decided if you feel it, it’s all right.”

Holy fucking shit. At this point, I'd like to point something out about the picture attached to that article that really struck me as appropriate:


So where does this leave her, on the Frantic Weaseling Detector? Well, nowhere, actually, because the bitch and her moron of a husband have both spoiled my fun by taking the Vatican's example to heart and just refusing to comment on any matter relating to how utterly fucking cocktrocious* their hypocrisies and lies are, and what awful excuses for human beings it makes them.

The previously unreported payments are on top of the $24,000 in federal and state funds that Bachmann & Associates, the clinic founded by Marcus Bachmann, a clinical therapist, received in recent years under a state grant to train its employees, state records show. The figures were provided to NBC News in response to a Freedom of Information request.

I guess we'll see the Bachmanns returning that money soon, huh? Yeah, didn't fucking think so.

*'Cocktrocious' is hereby declared an apt neologism for Republican policy. Google turned up the first 'no results found' page I've seen in years. That's got to change.

Monday, May 30, 2011

The Worm In The Apple, or Seriously, I'm Not Crazy

I consider myself a reasonable man.

I am not given to conspiracy theories. Birfers, troofers, moon landing hoaxists and other nutbars receive their due laughter from me. As an atheist, I stay vigilant and mindful of my thoughts and actions to make sure I'm not assuming too much and running off on a false premise.

I really, really, REALLY wish this looked remotely close to a false premise.

This, coupled with the recent revelations from an ex-Liberty University-schooled pastor (hat tip to Hemant Mehta at The Friendly Atheist for that one) is painting a very, very nasty fucking picture of what's going on here.

From the first link, about how many schools are using state funds to buy textbooks from evangelical Christian-supremacist publishers, and how closely tied that insanity is with the right wing in America in general:

Unsurprisingly, the textbooks are fiercely anti-abortion and virulently anti-gay, similar to the ideology of Religious Right organizations (heavily funded by Betsy DeVos and family) that have been labeled hate groups by the Southern Poverty Law Center. A Bob Jones current events text argues against legal protection for gays, stating, “These people have no more claims to special rights than child molesters or rapists.” The text uses an often-repeated phrase that homosexuals and abortion-rights supporters are “simply calling evil good.”

Ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffuck. Seriously? That's what they're putting in schools with innocent people's tax money?

They also teach a radical laissez-faire capitalism. Government safety nets, regulation, minimum wage and progressive taxes are described as contrary to the Bible.

Oh because it wasn't insane ENOUGH. As if Conservapedia's attempt to rewrite the Bible to make it LESS FUCKING LIBERAL weren't sufficient proof that they're willingly going for an echo-chamber approach to drag America away from democracy and into the hands of priests.

The A Beka civics text states, “God’s original purpose for government was to punish the evil and reward the good.” The same text describes the ideal form of government. “All governments are ordained by God, but none compare to government by God, theocracy.”

Well APPARENTLY NOT, the sons of bitches that they are. Holy fucking shit, I'm less than a page into this post and I already feel like I need a shower. Might as well plough on. What else?

Predating today’s “tenther” movement, the texts consistently accuse the federal government of exceeding its constitutional authority as described in the 10th Amendment and taking powers that belong to the states. The 14th Amendment, passed during Reconstruction to give citizenship to African Americans, is criticized as taking away state’s rights.

Concerning slavery in America, a Bob Jones high school text states, “To help them endure the difficulties of slavery, God gave Christian slaves the ability to combine the African heritage of song with the dignity of Christian praise. Through the Negro spiritual, the slaves developed the patience to wait on the Lord and discovered that the truest freedom is from the bondage of sin.”

Really?! They REALLY fucking went there and outright stated that waiting for things to change and relying on Christianity is the way out of slavery?! With their little fucking Bronze Age book where every single bastard prophet, from Moses to Jesus, is FINE WITH SLAVERY...they think their faith is the key to ending it? Fuck, when the American Civil War started, the bastard secessionists were citing the Bible in favour of their perceived right to keep slaves. Fuck your scripture, you bastards.

There's also some boilerplate in this shit about evolution being destructive to American society, which could only really be accurate if they defined 'American society' as...well, exactly the kind of ignorant pigfucker theocracy they're trying to superimpose on the country, to be honest. There's even some really old-fashioned shit about Communism being the "spawn of Satan" (their fucking words)and more recently topical bull concerning global warming:

Global warming is presented as a theory that is “simply not supported by scientific evidence,” and is supposedly promoted by environmentalists for destructive reasons, according to the A Beka economics text. ““Global environmentalists have said and written enough to leave no doubt that their goal is to destroy the prosperous economies of the world’s richest nations.”

Gotta love how they read 'environmentalist' as 'someone who wants to take away my money'. Love it in a vomiting-until-your-ears-leak-bile sort of way.

There's even anti-fiminist hinting in there, with a story of a fictional corporation going under due to a lawsuit from a female junior exec who was passed over for promotion in favour of a man.

A quiz in the teacher’s guide for the A Beka eighth-grade text Matter and Motion asks, “Why did superstition take the place of science during the Middle Ages?” The answer key tells us, “People did not have the Bible to guide them in their beliefs. Many looked back to the false ideas of Aristotle.” The next question is, “Why did modern science begin so suddenly in the 1500s?” The answer given is, “As people returned to the authority of the Scriptures during the Protestant Reformation (1517), they started learning the truth about God and His creation.”

No, you FUCKING LYING SHITWEASELS, the reason superstition took the place of science during the Middle Ages was because if you weren't obediently superstitious about the correct things, CHRISTIANS WOULD BURN YOU ALIVE.

A three-page section in this A Beka text leads with a headline “Two Faiths: Creation and Evolution” and states, “Creation, not evolution, is based on a reasonable faith.”

Evolution isn't based on any kind of faith, the same way the nuclear fusion inside a star isn't based on faith. Let alone the reasonable kind. That's the whole problem with these fucktards, really: their faith is the strongest mental force they've ever encountered, so they think - and they think this because they cannot, literally cannot conceive of any other way to come up with a conclusion - that every other statement ever made has been a statement of faith, not of fact. I'd almost give them this paragraph, except that creationism, while based on faith, sure as fuck isn't based on the reasonable kind.

The teacher’s edition of a A Beka geography text describes “Modern Africa’s Needs” as follows. “Africa is a continent with many needs. It is still in need of the gospel. Many people have gone there as missionaries but the continent is so vast, and spirit worship and the Muslim religion so strong, that only a small percentage of Africans claim to be Christians..."

Still in need of the gospel?! Most of the population of the fucking continent is HIV-positive because a sinister old Christian virgin (we fucking hope he's a virgin, given the Vatican's semi-official sexual preferences) told them condoms MAKE AIDS WORSE. If there's one fucking thing that whole place needs less of, it's scripture. Get some fucking good teachers in there instead of some priests, and we might have something...oh no, wait, here's why they think it doesn't count.

An A Beka text reads, "The doctrines and practices of the Roman church had digressed so far from Scripture that the church was compelled to keep its members from reading the Bible and discovering the truth."

They're actually right on that one. It took me until I read the Bible to discover the truth. That's how I became an atheist, via a brief period of Buddhism that lasted until I heard about karma. The problem here is that little word 'truth'. It does not mean what they think it means.

They're even going after mathematics. One of their book synopses describes FUCKING SET THEORY as a burden on modern teaching. I can only conclude that they saw Venn diagrams, didn't like the way two separate (but equal) colours were mixed together, and concluded that it was miscegenationist propaganda.

My attitude concerning America is starting to lean toward the 'get out before the Christian Taliban complete their fucking takeover' side of the meter. It's not helping that according to the second link (yeah, remember that?):

I want you to know that the fundamentalist political movement is the beginning of a cultural revolution that will take our nation to a very dark place. You have to understand that this has been methodically planned and is being carried out with the utmost vigilance. In accordance with their worldview, my old friends do not in the least care about what you think. They are against democracy, and they are seeking to end the rule of the majority in our great country.

They truly believe that if you have not been “saved,” you are living under a curse and are incapable of knowing what is best and that because of this you should be ruled over. You should also know they do not believe that even centuries-old Christian communities (Catholics, Anglicans, Greek Orthodox, etc.) are “saved,” only those who think like they do.

Speaking as someone whose nation's history actually involves that shit having been enshrined in law at one point? THIS IS A VERY BAD THING TO HEAR. It's time to get the ratfucking hell out of America, or start pushing back. Hard. It was founded on sanity. Don't let it die screaming in a straitjacket with a cross round its neck.

Friday, May 20, 2011

Save the Date!

Because this Saturday, on May 21st 2011, the rapture will happen. At least according to Harold Camping, and the thousands who believe him. Of course, he also predicted that it would end in 1994, but he was wrong that time.

And as the world laughs at these people who are selling all their worldly possessions, buying up billboard space, and taking to the streets to advise people that the world will end, I have a less ridiculing reaction. I think about the unborn babies of the pregnant women who believe this shite, and I think of how messed up their lives are going to be, born homeless because their parents were so Christian that they quit their jobs, sold their house, and await the second coming.

Of course, my classmates had to talk about it. They got the facts wrong and laughed about the world ending, and they brushed me aside when I didn't join in their ridicule and instead tried to correct them. The rapture isn't the end of the world. It's the start of the end, when God calls those who believe back to heaven, and those on earth will have to deal with things like the Anti-Christ, global wars between heaven and hell, global natural disasters, plague, and everything between. It's a touchy subject for any Christian, and not something to be laughed at.

So, as they laughed and got the facts wrong, my heart went out to those now in the streets, praying and trying to persuade others to join Christ. But at the same time, I have to wonder, is this the right thing for them to do?

For one, isn't the Rapture supposed to be unpredictable? "He shall come like a thief in the night", isn't that what it says?

Also, is it really good for people to suddenly quit their jobs and sell their worldly possessions in preparation for their last days on earth?

In my opinion, it isn't a smart thing nor is it a very Christian thing to do. These people are putting all their faith into a prediction of a human, who can and has been wrong. And instead of selling their worldly possessions and giving them to the less fortunate, who will still be less fortunate if they are called to heaven, they set themselves up for ridicule by buying billboard space. Sure, it's for the good of the people, but a man cannot live on spiritual faith alone.

Another point to bring up is those with children. Just by thinking that the children will be brought up to heaven with them is, in my opinion, like giving up on the children. It's an immoral and unfaithful thing to do! You don't just suddenly stop caring about a person when you feel like their in a good state. And even so, what if their lives fall apart? Why are these parents setting up their children for failure?

And a last point is this. Instead of setting themselves up for ridicule and anger, why don't these people live out their last days on earth being good Christians? (Or for that matter, why didn't they start before?) Instead of protesting gay marriage or ordering the public to pray for forgiveness, why don't they live by example? Give money to those who need it. Invite the poor and the homeless into your homes (as opposed to outright selling the houses). Put love and time into volunteer work. These are just examples, but these are things that people could start doing. Instead, I imagine them sitting on the sides of roads with signs saying "Repent! Are you ready for the Second Coming?", living in a tent, and spending their days yelling at those who laugh back, and praying in vain for those who won't listen.

It's late and I'm not making much sense. In any rate, from a Christian's point of view, this is my thoughts on preparing for a rapture. Live a life as you would anyway. Prepare for tomorrows. Live for today. Care for humanity, don't preach at it.

-The Christian

Monday, May 9, 2011

Doing It Pretty Much Right, Actually

At least on this issue.

That's an article from a site called Religion Dispatches, on an awesome video ad that highlights the importance of accepting LGBT believers into congregations, in part of an initiative called Believe Out Loud. Since the B in LGBT includes my girlfriend, I'm naturally in favour of anything that helps her stay happy without hiding who she is, including through her choice of worship.

As is to be expected, a Christian group (in this case one called Sojourners) refused to air the ads. What I didn't expect - and this is a very good indicator of how easy it is to fall into assumptions without evidence - is that this article in Religion Dispatches is actually lamenting this refusal by Sojourners, and actively taking the right stance - that LGBT people are people first, LGBT second. It's probably the first religious-sourced article I've ever seen actively advocating the welcoming of what could be called 'alternate' sexualities into congregations. For that, I applaud them. It's taken a damn long time for this statement to come. A lot of us had given up on more than a radical fringe of the monotheistic faiths ever actually accepting LGBT worshipers, instead of castigating them when they come out and thus frightening and pressuring those who are in the closet to stay right in there.

Of course, Sojourners' reasons - if they can be called such - are the same old coy, evasive bigotry-concealing bullshit we always hear from fucks like these:

I called the folks at Sojourners and asked what the problem was, what the “sides” in question might be. The first response was that Sojourners has not taken a stance on gay marriage (the ad is not about gay marriage); or on ordination of homosexuals (the ad is about welcome, not ordination); that the decision, made by “the folks in executive” (why such a high level decision?) was made quickly because of the Mother’s Day deadline. The rationale kept shifting. The reasoning made no sense.

Bullshit. My Frantic Weaseling Detector is bleeping like a reversing transport truck full of TV language censors. But this is all the same old bullshit we've all heard before from these wastes of glial matter, and that's not what I want to focus on today. Today, a church has caught my eye not by doing something so bad that it's outdone its fellow churches for fuckery, but by doing something actively good in opposition to 'popular' dogma - that is, in opposition to opinions that are popular among the dogmatic. They're bucking tradition, even if it's just a little. But with traditions like this shit, someone really is due a good bucking.

Few can doubt the need for this campaign. Public Religion Research finds that two-thirds of Americans blame the recent spate of young gay suicides in part on negative messaging that queer kids receive from the religious community. With an election cycle just over the horizon, LGBT concerns are very likely to be a topic of conversation on the airwaves, in our congregations and around the dinner table in many places around the country. Are our church leaders equipped to thoughtfully address this topic? Do they have practical tools to begin (or advance) the conversation forward in our churches?

Believe Out Loud is more than four years in the making. Virtually every mainline Protestant LGBT denominational advocacy group is a partner, making it a credible place for church leaders to turn for help on this issue. We have asked ourselves why Sojourners, a preeminent voice for justice in the religious community, rejected our ad buy. Does the organization not really believe in welcome for “everyone” in our churches or do they believe everyone is welcome, but they are afraid to “believe out loud” for fear of alienating some constituents? On one level, it doesn’t really matter. Their dilemma, apparently, is a ringing testimony for both the urgency and the necessity of this campaign since the issues they confronted are similar to those that face congregational leaders in addressing this concern within their settings. In recent years, American society has made significant strides forward towards full equality for LGBT persons. Tragically, the church has lagged well behind. Clearly, there is more work to be done.

Clearly. This is a good first step, guys and/or gals. Keep going, and don't fuck it up by retreating back the way you came. Not even once. And maybe one day there'll be a church that doesn't inspire revulsion in me through its teachings.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Evangelical Christians Will Steal Your Children*

*If you're gay and they get a chance.

Okay I'm seriously fucking pissed now. A lesbian couple have a daughter with one of them birthing the baby, and then later they separate. All sane so far. The biological mother of the child, who has custody while the other has visitation rights, converts to evangelical Christianity and declares they've 'cured' her of being gay. Retarded as shit as far as declarations go, but fuck her and good luck if she's dumb enough to try suppressing who she is.

Except now, her new religion means she doesn't want her child tainted by The Gay. She's been denying her ex-partner, Janet Jenkins, visitation rights to the child, resulting in the same court that ordered them now ruling that her ex legally has sole custody of the kid, named Isabella.

Mother and child went missing shortly afterward. They never turned up for the switch of custody, and they're now believed to be in Nicaragua - where they stayed, hidden from the law and the girl's decidedly rightful mother, in a house owned by a guy with close ties to Liberty University, home of bigots and brain(?)child of insane anti-Semite Jerry Falwell. Miller had had help stealing the little girl; a pastor from (fucking guess where) Tennessee has been arrested by the FBI in connection with smuggling Isabella out of the US, which is the new development that brought this to my attention.

The mother, Lisa Miller, had been attempting to fight the court order revoking her custody rights:

Miller also argued that Jenkins has testified that she would not attend church and would not take Isabella to any church that "taught hatred and bigotry."

I love that she thinks not taking the kid to church and not teaching hatred and bigotry means Jenkins shouldn't be allowed to raise the child. That's some quality insanity right there. More on this as/when it develops, although it might be a while as no one has seen or heard from Miller since November of 2009. What the shit the Nicaraguan authorities are doing about this remains to be seen.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Same Reason We've Got Creationists

This is becoming a pattern. Seriously. ANOTHER GOP State Senator. What is it with these motherfuckers?

This one, Stephen Wise, a State Senator for Florida (apparently named the Sunshine State because of what you can see in people's ears) wants to teach 'non-evolution' in schools.

Seriously. Because that's apparently the next step in wordplay after Intelligent Design joins flat-out Creationism on the 'everyone fucking knows you mean Genesis, you hillbilly-pandering retards' pile. Non-evolution? For real? Fuck, man, you're a career Republican, and your ability to make up shit that sounds convincing deserts you right then?

That's the only explanation I can think of. He suffered a Critical Lying Shithead Failure right as he was putting this together.

It's not the first time Wise has tried his hand at this type of legislation. In 2009, Wise mounted a failed effort more specifically focused on teaching intelligent design in public schools. Wise told the Tribune this week, however, that he believes the state Legislature's growing conservative makeup could pave a way for the bill's successful passage this time around.

During his battle then, Wise, a retired teacher himself, made his case on a radio station for including an alternative to evolution in the public school system's science curriculum.

"Why do we still have apes if we came from them?" Wise asked during an interview with the Tampa's WMNF. "And those are the kind of questions kids need to ask themselves. You know, 'How did we get here?' And, you know, there's more than one theory on this thing. And the theory is evolution, the other one is intelligent design."

Well, no, fuckhead, that's not what kids should be asking themselves. That's what they should be asking teachers, who should be allowed to give them the factually correct answer - which is to point out that we didn't come from apes, we are apes, and we came from the same common ancestor we share with chimps, and our two branches came from the same common ancestors as other apes like gorillas and orangutans. It's also the kind of question that shouldn't be asked, because only a moron tells a child that we came from the same apes that are around today. There is not more than one theory. There is one theory and there is a bunch of pricks with no knowledge or understanding of genetics howling about how they ain't kin to no monkey while they make faces previously only seen in gibbons. There is one theory and there are the dying howls of dogma. And you, you simpering self-righteous motherfucker, are on the wrong side.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Double sided bullshit is still bullshit

This. Is. Shit. (for the poor in Minnesota)

Yes. That is a link to republicans making it illegal for the poor and needy to get any sort of aid. Well, unless they have a bank account, which most don't. It prevents them from having twenty dollars in cash in their wallet. I mean really?

The idea behind it is so the money isn't used on drugs or things they don't need. Which by itself is a good idea and when you first read the title of it, that's all you think it is. But when you get deeper and follow the links, you realize that there are those who aren't drug users, who have no bank accounts or homes, and who desperately need the money.

Of course, the system is flawed. You could require drug tests and not give money out unless the person is clean. But they are still people who still need to live. What will they do without money?

It's crap what the system is. But it's worse that some people spend their entire lives contributing to how bad it is.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Earthquakes and changing the world

This isn't exactly a rant, but recently there was an extremely large earthquake off the coast of Japan.

It was so massive that it pushed the earth and made it turn just a little faster. There are massive tsunamis happening and will happen both there and on the west coast of the U.S., not to mention what will happen to the islands in between. Biggest concern is the nuclear plants that had their power cut. If a nuclear reactor overheats, that could mean catastrophic results there and wherever the wind blows. The fall out could cover a wide area. Brave workers are doing their best in a last ditch effort of using seawater as coolant to prevent this from happening.

Not to be discourteous to the Atheist and all other atheists out there, I'm praying for those people. At the moment it's all I can do for them.

But this raised a conversation between my mother and myself. Well, partially. We were also talking about my future, with college and career after that. I had been talking about what I want to do with my talents. I want to create a picture that will change the world, which is a massive attempt in itself. Unluckily, my degree is going more towards advertising about this specific product or another (Graphic Design. Ugh.) She asked me if this is really what I want to do, to be making ads for companies. I told her flat out that the only goals I have that are set in stone require me to have a higher paying stable job for a few years, and that this is merely a means to an end.

Well, what about changing the world? I still want to do that. Eventually. And we talked about what sort of change. A change like an earthquake, that actually makes the earth turn a little faster? Or something that changes a person in a moment, where they feel a little happier for a few minutes?

I still don't know. I do know one thing.

Justin Beiber's existence changed my world. D: I can't go anywhere without hearing about him. Seriously, he is the thorn in my side. Many of you may agree with me. Unlike some guys (like N-Sync or the Jonas Brothers), who gained some popularity and faded into oblivion, I don't think the same will be said with Beiber. Will he forever torment us with his girlish looks and screechy adolescent voice? Or will he be arrested for inciting a riot with thousands of screaming girls, and finally have a black stain on his career?

We can only hope.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Paging Doctor Mengele

It's been a while since I blogged. My new job is lots of fun and I love it, but it kicks the arse of my spare time for writing about infuriating shit.

So what stirs me from the pile of scrapped laptops and empty coffee jars I've been under for a fortnight? You guessed it, a Republican saying absolutely insane things about wanting to destroy someone else's rights. Well what were the fucking odds on that one?

Martin Harty, an old, white, old, senile, old, morally repugnant, old and plain fucking evil senator for New Hampshire, has openly stated his belief that disabled people - both mentally and physically so - should be sent out into frozen wastelands to die of exposure. And then refused to apologise for saying it. I'm totally fucking serious. Cop this:

In an interview and in an e-mail Omand sent to her friends, Omand said she called Harty, who represents her district, to tell him her concerns about the House Finance Committee’s proposed cuts to mental health services. Omand said Harty said he disagreed with her and made the comments about eugenics.

Omand says Harty then stated, “I wish we had a Siberia so we could ship them all off to freeze to death and die and clean up the population.”

Well fuck me rigid, I didn't realise the NH Republican position was 'fuck subtlety, let's go for Fascism right from step one'. Usually they at least make sure the public sees them take the Reich-friendly view on something scary, so they can quote a worst-case scenario - even if that last part has to be made up out of whole cloth. This senile old dickbiter didn't even bother to take the time to scare his constituents before aiming his tiny, tiny racial-purity dick at the human rights of thousands of people and trying to pull the trigger using a microscope and tweezers.

Even aside from his lack of buildup, what stuns me is the delivery itself - the phrasing, really, with the wishing that America had an equivalent to Siberia where people could be sent to die on the ice. Well shit, what's Alaska like this time of year, Marty? Hell, save yourself some time - dress a disabled woman up in a fur coat and put some caribou antlers on her head, some motherfucker will shoot her in the fucking face and hand the gun to Sarah Palin so she can pose with one boot on the corpse. You EVIL FUCKING SHITPILE.

Part of me - the paranoid part, the really scared part of anyone's brain that makes them stick a hand in their pocket to see if their keys have teleported back home in the five minutes since they last checked, the part trying to build its own tiny tinfoil hat out of the iron in my blood - wonders if this is actually animal cunning on the Republicans' part, if they decided to have Harty mouth off with something absolutely fucking unforgivable just so that (a) Fox News and all associated motherfuckers could start discussing it as if it had any merit as an idea, in the name of 'balance' and in an attempt to mainstream the concept, or (b) they could use the massive fucking public outcry generated by Harty's kamikaze run to slip something only slightly less hideous under the radar.

But then I remember the Republicans' voter base, and I realise they wouldn't dare do anything so anti-Genesis as admitting humans have animal cunning, or indeed animal anything. Let's face it, animal magnetism's right out...pity. I'd love to stick some porcupines to this motherfucker in particular.

Hat tip to my bro Curtis for pointing this motherfucker out to me.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Haven't talked in a while, but I have a lot to say

Randomly jumping around from blog to blog gave me some perspective. Christian bloggers are idiots.

Athiest bloggers actually use their heads.

I feel a little outnumbered here. :(

Are you average? I doubt it

Watch it. Love it. Know it. And then realize that 7 billion people is more than anyone will ever be able to count to in a life time. It's a number that most people couldn't even conceive of having in their bank accounts. (Well, it's been achieved 46.2 fold by a Mr. John D. Rockefeller, at $323.4 billion, which is way more than Bill Gates' net worth.)

7 billion is almost a billion more than the population just ten years ago. Which is almost a billion more than the population ten years before that! So, the entire world gained two billion people in two decades.

The most populated country is China, with over 1.3 billion people, a place where there are strict laws saying that there should be one child to one household. But in a place that honors sons more than daughters, how many of these sons will grow up, grow old, and die single?

In a place like India, without such laws, how many people will grow up, grow old, and die, having had a household of children?

Then with each birth, how many will have educations? Or will all of them have cars, cellphones, and no jobs?

And in places like Europe and the United States, where quite a few people do have good educations, how many women will grow up and go to school just to get married to be baby birthing machines? One to five children are the norm for most middle class families, but it seems that rich and poor families go overboard with the child birthing, though it helps neither one.

How much resources will we have in ten years to feed and shelter all the 8 billion people? Can everyone be fed, can everyone go to a good school or drink uncontaminated water?

In 2030, when the population hits 9 billion, how much more crime and poverty will exist? How many endangered animals will we cause to die out?

In 2040, when all of the world is drying out from the weight of 10 billion, will we realize that we're killing the world and try to rewind the damage started over a hundred and fifty years ago?

In 2050, will we all start to die in a mass extinction along with the animals we had all endangered? There have been about five others before, but will we cause the sixth, all 11 billion of us?

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

I'm Not Emo, I Promise, but...

...but I couldn't think of a title for this post that didn't sound like a My Chemical Romance lyric. Because I am sickened to my fucking stomach by THIS SHIT.

To paraphrase a famous writer, it's hard not to just post the word 'fuck' thousands of times at this point. WHAT do they think they're doing with this shit? Has the lowest common denominator really dropped so low that they're taking the excuse to pander to the mouthbreathing heavily-armed shitpiles that seem to pass for churchgoers for much of the South? Let's find out, with the all-new Frantic Weaseling Detector!

"This simply is to bring consistency to South Dakota statute as it relates to justifiable homicide," said [State Rep.* Phil] Jensen in an interview, repeating an argument he made in the committee hearing on the bill last week. "If you look at the code, these codes are dealing with illegal acts. Now, abortion is a legal act. So this has got nothing to do with abortion."

Fucking. Liar. Lying piece of shit and probably smirking as he said it. Weaselling Detector just blew up - we're gonna need a bigger rodent here. What other fucking harm to a foetus has anyone been killed over in the States in the last fifty fucking years?

Since 1993, eight doctors have been assassinated at the hands of anti-abortion extremists, and another 17 have been the victims of murder attempts. Some of the perpetrators of those crimes have tried to use the justifiable homicide defense at their trials.

OH FUCKING REALLY NOW. I wonder what kind of killing they're trying to make easier with this bill? MOAR QUOTES.

The original version of the bill did not include the language regarding the "unborn child"; it was pitched as a simple clarification of South Dakota's justifiable homicide law. Last week, however, the bill was "hoghoused"—a term used in South Dakota for heavily amending legislation in committee—in a little-noticed hearing. A parade of right-wing groups—the Family Heritage Alliance, Concerned Women for America, the South Dakota branch of Phyllis Schlafly's Eagle Forum, and a political action committee called Family Matters in South Dakota—all testified in favor of the amended version of the law.

More repeating patterns. It must be a meme by now - organisations with the word 'Family' in their name only use it because 'Decency' is out of fashion and 'Busybody' and 'Christian' are both way too honest.

Another proposed law, House Bill 1217, would force women to undergo counseling at a Crisis Pregnancy Center (CPC) before they can obtain an abortion. CPCs are not regulated and are generally run by anti-abortion Christian groups and staffed by volunteers—not doctors or nurses—with the goal of discouraging women from having abortions.

Called it. They can't fucking keep their noses out of anything. If anyone wants me, I'll be fuming and building a model of this awesome motherfucking robot:

Because awesome robots make life feel better, without having to pretend they're real.

* AGAIN with this shit. I'll give you three fuckmothering guesses as to which party Jensen's a State Rep for. Readers with pattern recognition skills of almost any kind will already know.

Monday, January 31, 2011

Just Something Awesome.

I've never shared this. But it is the ultimate answer to the idea that atheism leads to a loss of sense of beauty.

I'm just going to go and look up for a while.

We've Got Them Too

In the interests of fairness, I'm obligated to point this out. Truth be told, I'd struggle not to fucking deck him if I saw him. He's got one of those really punchable faces, and an attitude like a 'BOOT GOES HERE' sign on his arse.

There's only so many things a person can say to a reporter and stay among the ranks of the recognisably sane. This isn't one of them:

Green, 60, is founder and director of Christian Voice, a fundamentalist group he set up in 1994, whose website thunders against the vices — family breakdown, crime, ­immorality and drink among them — that are ruining the lives of ‘real people’. Green’s ­pronouncements are often outrageous. For example, after Hurricane Katrina devastated New Orleans in 2005 and killed more than 1,600 people, he claimed it was a result of God’s wrath and had purified the city.

Thankfully, the fucker doesn't have the ear of any MPs I know of, so that's something at least. But after dealing with some of the religious nutcases I see in news from other parts of the world, this guy - while horrible in his own way - just seems kind of a mediocre effort in terms of craziness. I've read of rabid theocrat anti-Semites advising world leaders, children being burned at the fucking stake after someone accused them of witchcraft, babies being held under faucets by Mormons to get them used to punishment for disobedience, good men being beaten to death for daring to question the idea of capital punishment for homosexuality, other good men being shot by their own security guards because they thought it was a bit over the top to execute atheists...this guy's craziness doesn't begin to compare. That said, he's a piece of shit and I'll be glad when he's fucking dead. Because I'm just like that sometimes.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

OK? Anything But!

It's great news for the intellectually neutered in Oklahoma this week, as Republican (again) State Rep (again) Sally Kern has given a press release defending her bill set to 'critique' (again) the theory of evolution in OK classrooms (why is it always the Republican state reps who come out with the most fucking batshit insane ideas ever to get rationalised by frothing limp-dicked cable news pundits*?)

It reads, “At the same time, teachers and students should be free to discuss critiques of the theory and no student should ever be penalized for personal views on this issue..."

Taken broadly (which is how it will be taken, the bastards) this essentially says that if a kid had been brainwashed into creationism by family or teachers and then proceeds to cite Genesis in a high school biology exam, that student legally could not be given a lower grade to reflect the lower percentage of knowledge in their answers. They wouldn't be able to mark shit as factually wrong if the students claimed their church said it. There are probably worse connotations to something like this, but when you take something as nebulous as 'personal views on the subject' and force an education system to equate those views with FACTS, then you're really basically saying 'Don't You Dare Fail Our Little Leviticus In Biology'.

Who the hell drafts a bill to put this concept into law? There are three options: political opportunists looking for the Stupid Evil Joe Fuckface Sportsbar vote, or genuine theocrats looking to replace the Constitution with the rule of what would basically be a white Taliban, or - worst of all - both at once, a group I tend to classify as 'evil fucking idiots' when I have to classify them at all.

This shit's been smacked down since the Dover decision, and damn fucking right, too. Bad enough that the stinking, shoeless foot of the Mythical Real American Shitkicker is always scrabbling for a toehold in schools, but then stupid shitheads like this come along and provide custom-made places for that pungent foot to set down - including spaces for the webs between the toes.

Kern said her bill clearly states that it is not an endorsement of any religious belief. HB 1551, Section 2, Para. E, reads: “The provisions of the Scientific Education and Academic Freedom Act shall only protect the teaching of scientific information, and shall not be construed to promote any religious or nonreligious doctrine, promote discrimination for or against a particular set of religious beliefs or nonbeliefs, or promote discrimination for or against religion or nonreligion.”

Yeah, fucking right. It clearly states it doesn't endorse a religion. Let's think; what other groups are trying to poke holes in the titanium replica of Hadrian's Wall that is the fact of evolution, aside from religious fundamentalists? Why NONE! How queer. For fuck's sake, even countries with real, actual official state religions know it's true. Everything that's ever lived has proven it true through one simple fact: genetics. We don't even NEED fossils at this point - genetics alone prove common descent. Yet these pieces of shit are still trying to bring their ancient, creaking, rusting god to bear on established facts so they can pull the trigger.

This is what happened to Baghdad! Not in fucking 2003, either! Centuries back, Baghdad was actually the centre of the scientific world (interesting fact: after 9/11, when Bush started his Us Versus Them rhetoric, he claimed 'our god is the god who named the stars'...but if you take a look at the recorded names of stars visible with the naked eye, two thirds of them have Arabic names). When fundamentalist Islam started making its play for power in the Middle East, all of Baghdad's learning was wiped out in a shitstorm of heresy-burning. That is frighteningly similar to what's been illustrated here, and elsewhere: organised religion, no matter what kind, tries to eradicate knowledge to keep its power and worship intact.

Your Magical Truthsaying Bastard Mick-endorsed Google search for today is 'Rush Limbaugh Viagra Laughter'. Don't be drinking anything when you read the results.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011


A letter's been found from the Vatican to Irish bishops, basically ordering them not to report child-raping clergy to the police. Got the bastards.

I've been waiting for this for years. The Vatican's spent a very long time telling everyone it didn't do exactly this shit. They're going to bleed money really fucking quick now, not least because they've now been empirically, publicly proven as liars and hypocrites on this topic. They've declined to comment on it, which the armchair detective in me is inclined to stomp on as a dead giveaway, but even discounting that (since jumping all over 'no comment' is how tabloids do shit, and even profane slobs like me have standards) they're basically bang to rights here. Ratzi would be implicated too, since his department was the group in charge of investigating this shit for years.

Let's see how this pans out...I can't wait until Bill Donohue gets hit in the face with this shit.

Out Of Everyone's Misery

Just a quick thought about something that's started to piss me right off recently.

None of the things I'll mention are particularly recent, but considering them together only started when I was watching some awesome Hitchslaps (short clips of Christopher Hitchens laying the smackdown on someone for following a concept that's either immoral or bloody stupid); while most of the time his attitude isn't something I'd emulate toward people's personal faiths since it's all dependent on that person, institutionalised religion is every bit as foul to me as it is to him.

Anyway. One of these clips that really got to me was Hitch being interviewed on Fox following the death of Jerry Falwell, who is quite possibly the poster child for 'utter fucking dick' in America for the 1970s (although there were so many at the time, this is debatable); Hitch is told he's not a nice person, essentially, for being happy that Falwell died. Now I know some of the things Falwell did, although for the sake of my sanity I won't read too much of it. This son of a bitch was a fervent theocrat, and put even more effort into dodging the US Constitution's First Amendment - for readers outside the US, that's that pesky part about religion not being allowed to run America* - than I put into avoiding reality TV. And that's saying something. He was a raging anti-Semite and anti-feminist, declaring that Jews are "spiritually blind and desperately in need of their Messiah and Savior" and that women "need a man to tell them what time of day it is and to lead them home", as well as blaming 9/11 on everyone in America who didn't think evangelists should be in charge. He was a piece of shit and I'm glad he's fucking dead. So is Hitchens, and openly said so, and suddenly he's accused of speaking ill of the dead.

And here's my main point. What is this shit? Speaking ill of the dead? What, are they more sensitive to criticism now that they're fucking dead? Hitch's reaction to Falwell finally dying is a perfect example of this - Falwell's family believe that anything not Christian is evil and must be purged from America, I doubt they fucking care about Christopher's approval, but no! Can't say bad things about people after they die! Apparently they can hear it, or it makes people around you uncomfortable or some silly shite. Grow the fuck up.

What would it take? What would someone need to do, for it to be acceptable to be happy they've died? I'm gonna Godwin this right out of the gate - Adolf Hitler was a piece of shit too, and I'm glad he's also dead. Hell, the only material differences I can find at a glance between Falwell and Hitler was their country of origin, their age, which particular denomination of Christianity they followed and the fact that Hitler got control of an army.

So given that Falwell basically spent his life preaching that the only way to go to heaven was to treat certain groups as subhuman - an attitude otherwise not seen in American politics since South Carolina cited the Bible's support of slavery in the document announcing their secession from the Union, and the start of the civil war - is it somehow not enough to warrant calling him a cockmongler after he's dead?

Fuck that. I'll speak ill of bastards, dead or alive. Someone has to.

*Stop laughing at the back there. I know, I know - despite what it looks like, religions are legally not allowed to run the United States. Stunned me too when I first heard about it, but it begs the question - if this is what it's like when organised Christians aren't allowed control over America, what would it be like if they were?

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Stick Your Head Up In A Shitstorm

One of the bravest bastards I ever heard of died the other day.

Salman Taseer, governor of the Pakistani province of Punjab, was murdered by one of his own security guards over his opposition to the death penalty for blasphemers. This comes in the middle of the furore over Asia Bibi, a Pakistani Christian accused of blasphemy by people who didn't like her ('cause we all know a zealot with a grudge is a perfect eyewitness when you want to avoid bias). Now it seems the screaming, reeking bastards who howl for the blood of their faith's critics have gone one step further and started murdering anyone who tells them to calm down. Wonderfully fucking sane reaction there.

To make matters worse - because it can always get worse with a church in power - they've started threatening people who look upset about it.

Five hundred scholars from the moderate Barelvi sect of Sunni Muslims have warned that anyone who expresses grief over the assassination could suffer the same fate.

"No Muslim should attend the funeral or even try to pray for Salman Taseer or even express any kind of regret or sympathy over the incident," said the Jamaat-e-Ahl-e-Sunnat Pakistan in a statement.

It said anyone who expressed sympathy over the death of a blasphemer was also committing blasphemy.

I swear to fuck, it's days like this when the contraceptive bomb and other inhumane borderline-genocidal shit almost looks tempting. Because these are the Enemy. A church on the back foot, like the Catholics at the minute, behaves in as conciliatory a manner as possible - because it needs a power base more than anything, like a reality TV show needs an audience base. When it's in power, however...well, a quick search on the word 'inquisition' will show you the Catholic track record for benevolent rule.* Islam, on the other hand, has decided to adopt a strategy that goes entirely against its own name - fuck submission, let's machine-gun anyone who tries any of that smarty-pants logic or that goddamn hippie bleeding-heart 'tolerance' bullshit.

Salman Taseer did what few people dare - he worked against demonstrably dangerous, armed people with a track record of going completely bugfuck insane over people even having an opinion different to theirs. He got his head blown off because he stood tall in a screaming shitstorm and dared to call it what it is. The murderer confessed with a smug fucking grin on his punchable fucking face, the priests have declared it a capital offence against the church if anyone mourns or goes to the funeral, and this act of FUCKING TERRORISM will sink among the waves of shit.

Which is more than we can hope the fundies would do.

*For a more modern look at the worldview of organised Christianity when it thinks it has the political and moral high ground, your quotation search for the day is 'Ann Coulter'. Make sure to watch your blood pressure, this bitch is dangerous.